Of weird birds and blur girls

HOT NEWS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A rare species of birds have recently been spotted near Ulu Yam, Selangor specifically at the Hutan Lipur Sungai Tua. A group of teenagers from a Christian youth group out on their Form 4 trip reported this exciting news as they were cooking mushrooms and running after inflatable balls in the laundry-washing waters of Sungai Tua.

Bird lovers all across the country have pricked their ears and steadied their camera-toting arms, eager to catch a glimpse of the JACLYNBIRD bird species. However they might be better off buying hearing aids to help them in their cause as the JACLYNBIRD is painfully quiet yet cute and feels at ease with humans. More information on this later.

According to a National Council of Weird Paranormal Abnormal Bird Hybrids spokesman, the JACLYNBIRD can be found mainly in Petaling Jaya,especially at Damansara Jaya where students of a secondary school were believed to have spotted this unique bird. There were also reports of the JACLYNBIRD seen roaming around Heritage Centre, a church building in Section 13/6, Petaling Jaya belonging to Petaling Jaya Evangelical Free Church. The spokesman concluded that the recent spotting of the JACLYNBIRD was unusual as Ulu Yam is 24KM away from the bird's natural habitat.

Incidentally, the youth group who reported the sighting of the JACLYNBIRD were from the very church that the bird is often spotted in, that is Petaling Jaya Evangelical Free Church. This bird is believed to own strong emotional attachments to people and possesses unique traits unlike any other bird. Therefore, it is safe to conclude that the JACLYNBIRD feels a sense of belonging to the particular church.


A TIP FROM OUR VERY OWN 'WEIRD BIRD' EXPERT:
Bird lovers who wish to catch a glimpse of the JACLYNBIRD can do so by visiting Impact Youth Ministry at 4pm every Saturday or drop by for Bible Knowledge Class on Sunday at PJEFC. A word of caution though, birdlovers should constantly maintain silence because "THE JACLYNBIRD CAN ONLY BE HEARD IF ONLY YOU KEEP REALLY REALLY QUIET", as quoted by ChinHuiYing of the Federation of Leapyear Babies Who Are Also Bimbos. You would have a better chance trying to talk to it rather than listening for it as the JACLYNBIRD emits a very low frequency chirp/birdcall/noise/sound/voice. Again,"THE JACLYNBIRD CAN ONLY BE HEARD IF ONLY YOU KEEP REALLY REALLY QUIET". Approach JACLYNBIRD politely & say hello, and impress it by constantly saying "HUHH???" just like Jaclyn Yee, a JACLYNBIRD expert who has won numerous accolades as a renowned JACLYNBIRD trapper. Women also have a higher chance of spotting or catching the JACLYNBIRD even though it is scientifically proven that the JACLYNBIRD is indeed female,unless of course you happen to be a male 14 year-old teen studying at SMKDU who can't be named here due to privacy reasons. So, all the best birdlovers=) go get em JACLYNBIRD!!!

KNOW YOUR "JACLYNBIRD" FACTS:
JACLYNBIRD is a female bird belonging to the YEE family. A JACLYNBIRD is best known for the habit of TRYING to mimick and copy the sounds of other birds, but always fails. However this failure often produces a sound unlike no other,which has been described as cute and adorable by many bird lovers. During the season known as 'THE TIME WHEN JAC YEE GETS BLUR', the JACLYNBIRD often emits a sound which closely resembles a 'HUHHHHHHHH???' by the respected Jaclyn Yee, whom the JACLYNBIRD was named after.
The JACLYNBIRD is known to be really afraid of spiders and Kerry Lee. The sight of a spider even a few cars away can cause the JACLYNBIRD to shriek and scream in horror. This bird shares a similar trait with the parrot owned by Jeff Dunham; both can't fly.

Description:
* Large-sized songbird which is 5foot-tall and shorter than the average human.
* No tail.
* Long feathers only on top of head: like humans.
* Not too thick or too thin bill.
* Two wings with individual fingers.
* Front teeth protrudes slightly.
* Black feathers.
* Size: 5 feet
* Wingspan: 2 feet
* Weight: 45kg


- jaclynbird =D -


Sex Differences:
Only available in female form.

Sound:
Song is a series of varied phrases, the most common being " HUHH??? ". Includes much mimicry and copying of other bird songs and calls.

Conservation Status:
Only one found so far but not facing threats of extinction for at least another 60 years, God willing. Found in Petaling Jaya, but have been spotted once in Ulu Yam.

Cool Facts:
* Feeds on rice, char kuay teow, roti canai and all things Malaysian
* The JACLYNBIRD is a persistent singer. It sings all through the day mimicking other bird callers
and emitting a long and loud " HUHHH??? "
* The JACLYNBIRD continues to add new sounds to its song repertoire throughout its life.
* Has an extremely high IQ and has done exceptionally well in human examinations, notably the PMR and SMKDJ midterms.


PEOPLE WITH MORE INFORMATION OF THE HIGHLY RARE JACLYNBIRD,PLEASE EMAIL gigaderek292@gmail.com
Pictures of the JACLYNBIRD will be posted soon.